guilt of what, petunia?

From walking away from my elderly mother and leaving her alone to die just for my own emotional self-care.

I suppose had I done it years ago, I might not have guilt about this.? (still doubt that)

I'd feel like I'd be abandoning her in her hour of need, even thought that's what she did to me.

I am strong enough to bear it a few more years.

I am not one to bite the dog back, just because it bit me, and that's how I'd feel.