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Originally Posted by Akuma
...but I don't know where else this would fit.
So much is going on right now that it's kind of overkill to be starting therapy for my OCD as well.
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So, this is a valid point.
But there's also the other side of the coin- you are encountering a lot of things in which the use of tools and coping skills, as well as a sounding board that may provide some productive feedback [see:therapist] would be extremely valuable to help you deal with all of this that you are currently going through.
So yes, it is yet another thing, another stressor. But it is also a stressor that gives some benefits, some return.
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I'm tempted to cancel the therapy, but I took some unusual routes to get therapy so easily, without jumping through certain hoops, and it would probably take many more months before I'd get the opportunity again. My OCD is always a problem, just a different severity; I am disabled by it, but I'm alive, and I'm worried, that piling too much onto my plate will make me unstable.
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I have that temptation often, myself. Sometimes I give into it. It rarely works to my benefit. Therapy often actually provides more than just the actual therapy itself. It can give some kind of stability and something that we are accountable for [appointments we have to show up for], a person we can rely upon who basically is required to assist us. Also, though the whole transportation, random people, waiting room, random stranger in a room thing can be frightening... those things in themselves can actually improve where we stand with the OCD.
But it can suck, for sure. Particularly the first few weeks.
And it may seem you are going backward at first, because therapy is not neat and tidy and comfortable.
It can be strange and uncomfortable and sometimes dig up icky stuff.
But it can help.
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27 years old and still need that sort of support - a grown man should stand his own and fight his own battles, or so part of my believes.
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But you state this as if you don't.
Everyone faces a different sort of battle each day.
There are things you are capable of, I am certain, that others find extremely difficult and uncomfortable and balk at.
But because we put "sitting in a crowded room with total strangers" in the "should be perfectly able to do this category"... fairly arbitrarily I might add, [isn't it like an inherent reaction to be at least slightly suspicious of complete strangers when trapped in a small space with them? i mean when we see it from an evolutionary/survival point of view?]
people are seen as incapable in general if they can't do selective things of that nature.
I find that bizarre.
Anyway.
Enough of my social commentary.
Do whatever you have to do make it to therapy.
Even if you make it to therapy and sit there and feel completely unproducitve, it is going to help in the long run.
Tell the therapist you are uncomfortable or don't want to/can't tell them anything.
They will probably get it.