So this morning. I had the mother of all anxiety / panic attacks. I have had some really bad depression the last several days. This morning, my husband suggested I take a bath and soak for a while. Interesting enough, I never, ever, ever take baths. I always take showers have never really thought about why I don't take baths.

Anyway, after about 5 mins of soaking I started noticing I was feeling slightly dizzy ( the water was warm, not hot at all ). I ignored the dizzy feeling concentrating or at least trying to on the book I was reading. 10 more mins passed, the dizziness was getting a little worse and breathing was becoming shallow. My son came in the bathroom ( he is 3 ). I told him to go back downstairs with his daddy, that I was gonna take a shower and I would be right down. At this point I knew I was gonna have an anxiety/panic attack and figured that maybe a cool shower and some deep breathing would help. BIG MISTAKE, I started the shower and no sooner than I stood up, I almost blacked out. I yelled for my husband, he came upstairs by this time I was in full blown panic/anxiety attack. He knew the drill, get me some cold water to drink and keep telling me to breath. Well none of this was working. I told him to help me out of the shower. He helped me out, I took one step forward and hit the floor. I couldn't move, everything was in slow motion, I couldn't breath right, it felt like I was dying and it seemed like the room was tilted and upside down. I could barely talk, my speech was blurred I told him to just get me on the bed, but then I blacked out. Woke to him yelling wake up, and that he was gonna call an ambulance. I managed to say no, just help me up, I need to breath. I felt like I was doing a little better ( even at my worse, I tell myself I am fine and will push myself ). He helped me stand up. I leaned forward and rested my head on the bathroom counter for a few seconds. Stood up straight went to turn around to grab a towel and blacked back out again. I came too with my husband standing over me and I was slumped against the wall. I started crying and telling him I was so sorry. I apparently had wet myself after I blacked out. He helped me to a sitting position. Handed me my water, I took sips of water and got my breathing under control and we cleaned up the mess. I took a quick shower with his help and then after I got dressed laid down for a while.

Now, I have never ever had an anxiety / panic attack this bad. In the past I have blacked out before but, only a few second and the attacks never lasted more than a few mins and took about 30 mins. to an hour to recover from. This one lasted about 10 mins and I blacked out twice. It took me all day long to recover. I just started feeling halfway decent about an hour ago and the attack happened around 9:30am.

My reg. doctor has had me on heart monitors before even sent me home with one for 24 hours and another for 2 weeks and of course, I never had an attack while wearing the monitors. Nothing showed on the results. My blood pressure always reads normal even when I am in extreme pain. After lots of tests they decided my attacks were anxiety / panic and of course sent me on my way. I have had to always just deal with them in my own way by, trying to calm down, breathing slowly, try to sip cold water and my husband if he is available talks me through them. If my attacks are becoming this bad my fear is what if my husband isn't around and I am here with my children all alone.

Has anyone ever had attacks this bad and if so what have you done to get through them?