I'm sorry i don't deserve to post or ask for help but i'm really struggling. I've had depression for a long time. Some days i feel ok but these days i'm really struggling. I have a T and a p-doc but i'm on meds for only psychosis as my p-doc seems to think my main issue is psychosis. The thing is that i'm thinking of dying a lot these days - well about a couple of months really. I have overdosed a couple of times in the past couple of months. I just couldn't tell anyone. I just don't want to be sent to hospital again. I'm scared of what i might do so i moved in with my parents at the beginning of the summer. But i didn't tell them about the suicidal thoughts. My p-doc knows about the overdoses but she thinks it's another way for me to self injure and she doesn't know about the suicidal thoughts. She told me to call her at times like these but i never know what to say to her if i called. And i feel like it's time to move back to my own place but i'm scared i might make "a more serious attempt" cause up until now, i kind of stopped myself from making a serious attempt cause i live with my parents and i don't want them to know. I don't know what to do. I don't want to live like this anymore. But i feel like i'm stuck! I guess i'm just looking for some advice. Sorry i didn't mean to write such a long post.