Hi. I have been diagnosed with Bipolar 3 years ago and was looking for some advice.. I was wondering if bipolar has taken a toll on anyone else's relationships? I just got engaged 6 months ago to honestly the most amazing man I have ever met. He treats me so good, does nothing wrong but yet when I go through bipolar he's my main target. He has even through all of the bipolar episodes accepted how I am so much to want to marry me. So why do I do this? My episodes start over stupid random things that would never bother me. These examples are things that some of my obursts did happen from which note are things that wouldn't bother the normal me by one bit: one is something as STUPID as a girl liked his picture on facebook, another is when his friend asked us to hang out and i didn't want to but he still was fine with it even when i didn't want to go, another is when he bought a new pair of shoes that in my mind at the time thought was careless of him but i knew he actually needed them and had enough money to and probably the most ridiculous of all was when i asked where he wanted to go to dinner and he said he didn't know and that i should pick. When I have these outburst I treat him horribly saying the most meanest things I can think of, trying to hit him if it gets that bad, cry, yell, curse, sometimes hit myself and throw things around. All of this over NOTHING! and then after I snap back to reality it's too late. He says he can handle it. But I know it is so hard for him and it scars him. It breaks my heart knowing that I have done something like that to the person who treats me so good and loves and cares about me more than anyone. honestly I am not kidding he treats me like a princess and I am so heartbroken he has to go through this. for how such a great, kind person he is i believe he does not deserve it. I go a complete 360 when my outbursts happen. Normal me is a laid back, kind person, who has a great sense of humor and good attitude but bipolar me is this monster like the hulk that i can not control who just likes to hurt and destroy. It makes me so depressed because I am not like that at all. I don't have outbursts very often, it varies from 1 outburst every month, two months or three months. But when it happens it hits hard and makes up for all the time I went without one. I am on Lamictal 350 mg. I was wondering if anyone had advice for me. I would really appreciate it. Thank you.