I'm still waiting to hear if I got the leadership position at my company, and two other people got promoted who haven't worked there as long as I have. There are actually several positions available, so there's still hope. One of my friends at work got promoted, and while I am happy for her, I feel really jealous. I'm so ashamed of myself. I really am happy for her, truly.

I just have been pushing myself so hard lately, working hard at doing the best job I can, applying for several other outside positions, etc. I just want something to come of this. I know my feelings will really be hurt if I am not promoted at the place that I have worked at for 4 years. I'm trying to think positive, but I'm feeling pretty low atm. And then I have the negative thoughts: "Why did you expect for something good to happen? You don't deserve anything good in your life." All I know is that if I don't get promoted I'm definitely out of there.