Maybe it's a crazy request, but I am trying very hard to find the motivation to take care of myself, and every time I get closer to tapping into that inner reserve of strength, my crazy family (that I have no choice but to deal with on an ongoing basis) finds a way to sabotage my efforts. Criticism, condescension, indifference, judgement, and on and on. I not only don't have any source of emotional support, I'm constantly besieged by the slings and arrows of familial dysfunction. I am made to feel insignificant, burdensome, pathetic, irresponsible, inadequate, unlovable... Basically, like s***. And it occurred to me that I would practically sell my soul to hear something positive, something nice. I would give my right arm (Ok, maybe not the arm, I need that for typing, but definitely a leg; I'm Ok with giving up either one) to feel like someone somewhere has had a pleasant thought about me.

I'm kind of...I don't know...neuroatypical?...in a way that makes it extraordinarily difficult for me to connect with people. Or at least to sustain that connection. I have a terrible time making friends; I have a terrible time making conversation (which is kind of a necessary precursor to making friends). So I don't have any. Friends, that is.

It feels like a tall request, I know you don't know anything about me, but I could really use some encouraging words right now.