I just retired after 30 yrs working for a large utility in the NE. I was shy but fooled everyone. I worked with all men, a couple hundred at my work site. Over my years I became a shop steward. I sat in meetings, defended coworkers ,laughed. Vice presidents of the company know me personally. No one has a clue about my probs.

I can't handle any birthday party or celebration. I can't even handle my own family parties. I used to hide and drink in the garage as I could hear everyone singing HAPPY birthday. Even my son's birthdays were to much. My wife fights with me after every family party. She says I was rude.BTW , I stopped drinking 9 months ago when I retired also lost 45lbs. Of coarse I would not allow a retirement party .