Do not be scared. We cannot control the future in any way.
If you let anxiety dominate you, it's going to be much more complicated.

You want to live and this is a good thing, a very good thing. A lot of people don't know what to do with their lives.
So stick to your will and to positive thoughts. Just as you found ways to get out of your black hole when you were younger and with less opportunities, you will find your way now.

Don't panic, stay concentrated on the good you built and the good you want in your life.

You already learned and practiced the biggest lesson in life: that you can turn bad into good.

No panic, no anxiety. Watch yourself in the mirror and smile. Remember yourself of everything you have done up to now. You've done miracles once, you can do miracles twice.
Please stay positive. Fight bad feelings and thoughts with all your might.