You know, I probably would have told you how when I first joined the forum. I had just picked up the habit again (after doing it a few times 4-5 years ago). And I was talking to someone on here (don't remember who cause i was still getting to know people) who told me that if I didn't stop it would get out of control. And I told him that wasn't possible, because I had it under control.

And I did. I stayed in one area, and it was just light stuff, and it was okay.

Well, it's been almost two months now and he was right. It hasn't gotten bad, but i've cut outside my set boundary, and have scars that I didn't want to have. And I am building a tolerance to the pain. And it's not worth it.

What I will suggest to you is the rubber band method. I don't necessarily equate it with cutting, but since i've been doing it, it's been okay. When i feel like its not touching the pain like a razor will, I pop more, back to back, harder. And i promise you - it hurts.

I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling so sad though that you have a desire to inflict pain on yourself. If you need someone to talk to, feel free to PM me. I don't think I give the best advice, but I'm always willing to listen, and well, sometimes that helps.

And you know, you don't have to hurt yourself at all if you don't want to. Taking a walk on a cool day, listening to music, splurging on your favorite snack/treat, chatting on here, and naps can really help as well. What always works best for me is grabbing a drink (usually iced coffee or tea, sometimes soda) and a snack, cutting the lights off, putting in a good movie, wrapping up in my blanket and focusing intently on the movie. It doesn't solve my problems, but it helps me move away from focusing on them so intently and makes the burden easier to bear.

I hope this helps you. I care about you