Quote:
Originally Posted by LostBear
I think about this everyday now, which probably means I need them more than ever.
I am a physician but I wasn't diagnosed as bipolar until after a lot of erratic behavior got me kicked from residency. Now my medical education seems to have to value. I have tried getting a medical license - so I can at least say I am or was a licensed physician, but to no avail. Licensing boards cite either my past behavior or potentially future bad behavior.
I have missed my hypomania before. I always feel less driven. Now I miss my depression and want to feel like I am in a pit and cry and hit stuff, but all I get is a kind of numbness.
Just wondering.
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I think about stopping my medications quite frequently too. I don't miss the severe mania or mixed states but I do miss the energy and creativity I had when I was hypomanic. I also frequently think about stopping my meds because since starting them I've developed high blood pressure, thyroid issues, and possibly being diabetic.
Sometimes I want to throw in the towel because even though it was full of ups and downs life seemed easier before treatment. However, I have this need to be in control of my bipolar and if I quit bipolar wins and that I can't accept. So, don't stop your meds...you'll be better off!!
What is your diagnosis? I'm bipolar 1 with mixed states. What meds are you taking? I'm on Lithium 900mg, Seroquel 400mg XR, and 3mg of Klonopin.