Today a bunch of my relatives are coming over for a BBQ. I feel so anxious right now - - like preparing for them will make me reallly tired and I won't be able to stay with them as long as they're here.

Somehow I have to relax about it, or that will make me even more tired. I think it's time to take the dogs for a walk. I really need to slow down and relax, and realize they love me and no matter how it goes that won't change.

I just feel like I can't think straight though - - like I don't know what to do when to get ready. One step at a time.

Wow, do I feel messed up today . . .