Quote:
Originally Posted by neutrino
It sucks that you feel that way. I can relate though. Even though it wasn't "beaten into me that only bad girls cry" I still don't cry in front of others (I think it has to do with my social anxiety). How does your therapist react in those situations? I mean, he/she must notice that you're not doing too well, right?
|
He doesn't do anything. And by that I really mean nothing, nada, zip, zilch. He doesn't offer me a tissue, doesn't move closer, doesn't take my hand, offer a hug...nothing. If, despite my best efforts, a few tears leak out and/or my voice breaks, he might stop talking as if he's giving me a few moments to pull myself together but that's it.
He's actually reinforcing my beliefs that crying in front of people is bad, although I don't think that's his intent. When he does nothing, it makes me feel like he is disgusted with me, that all he wants is this useless fat lump of **** to get out of his office and never come back. I understand that he needs to establish boundaries and that the last thing either of us want is transference, but...I just wish that he cared about me enough as a person - not a family member, not a close friend, not anyone he thinks about in a romantic way but simply as a person he has gotten to know and does not want to see in this much pain - to offer some sort of comfort and/or support.