I do the exact same behaviour. I hate that I do it too. I have had great success recently with the ice cubes. It works great for me. I have a million and 1 stories of how I punished my hubby for "his reactions" to me. He makes me accountable for my own tantrums, outbursts etc. I hate that as well, but yet I appreciate that he isn't my doormat. It can be a miserable place to be, in that head of ours. Hugs and watch a good movie, something that will change the focus so you lose track of time. After the ice cubes though. I thought that sounded stupid until I tried it