Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnaBegins
I've wondered the same thing about whether or not he is good for me. When he's calm, he's very nice and supportive and loving - almost like a father figure. But when he gets excited, he pushes me pretty hard about doing aggressive things to "fix" my BPD, most of which I don't feel comfortable with. The last time we had a disagreement because he wanted me to do something I thought wasn't quite the right thing, he started yelling at me in public - much like my specific father figure. I think his intentions are good - he probably just wants me to get better and stop being such a basket case around him - but his methods are borderline triggering.
|
Uhhh no. Never right. Do not allow him to ever humiliate you in public. Walk away from that sh*. I can tell right now that he's probably very controlling of you and let me guess.. He's "nice and supportive..." when you're "behaving" and doing what he feels you should be doing. I've had people like this in my life and I feel for you. We tend to be people that mold to others and the truth is the controlling, aggressive people like that are the worst for us. I know some of them mean well but at the same time they have their own problems with allowing others to be independent thinkers, in fact they can hate it when people don't follow their rules. That is detrimental to your progress if it's as bad as it looks from your description. Please do at least take a look at this relationship a little closer
Quote:
|
I am really afraid to talk to my t too much about this. If I tell him I don't trust myself not to OD, that combined with my tendency to SI (which he does know about) might result in a forced trip to the hospital. I believe that if that happens, I will just give up and stop making an effort to fight my way out of the place I'm in right now.
|
I still maintain that it's the best route. the T is there to help you and if they do not know every detail of your challenges, they can't fully help you. If this makes you feel better, I know it seems like it's a possibility of ending up in the hospital, this is not really the case. Unless you're threatening to SI, suicide or OD right then, unless it's a current threat, they won't do that. You're talking about tendencies not currently active behaviors, so really you should be ok.. Hope this helps.
Quote:
|
Thank you for this - it really means a great deal!
|
You're very welcome. Hope I've been helpful.