My present therapist said studies show men "get over" stuff much sooner than woman, sometimes even forget they upset us, grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr ! She also said that woman (studies shown this too) brood over stuff more readily than guys, and this may be why they can't understand why us woman get upset and take a while to cool down. Studies, studies and more studies, let's face it someone gets hurt regardless and it is not natural to just quickly "get over" it. I do not have the answers but if he doesn't want therapy, you still go if you think it could help you personally, it can't hurt
Maybe it is not "healing" that takes place, maybe it is more like growing callous and moving on?
Wish I knew how the hell to "fix" what happened to me and this nightmare, but I don't know yet so I keep with my therapy appt.s and see my pdoc, keeping track of my progress.
Funny how things work out, "they" go on in the world like nothing ever happened while I am still working at it
Lots of luck with this, it is hard but the children give you strength towards whatever decision you make rather to stay or leave.
"darkeyes"

In giving advice seek to help, not please your friend
SOLON