Your probably reading too much in to the whole thing, I do that a lot too, over analyze. I like to be asked even if i have no intention of going. Why shouldn't they ask me? That's the narcissist in me. Then I get totally pissedoff if I feel skipped or avoided! I get angry and hate everyone, that's the BPD in me. Usually though I am simply over reacting and analyzing it way too much. I suspect it might be the same for you. As for splitting, if any one ever figures out how to avoid it, please let me know too!!!