It does sound like an eating disorder to me, too. I can identify with your story quite a bit. I obsess about food & my weight (currently 50 lbs. overweight but was anorexic in college--only drank booze--didn't eat!). My self-esteem is very much tied to my weight so it is very low now. Feel disgusted with self, etc. Seeing a nutritionist & therapist. Am also bp 1 & on anti-psychotic as well as other meds. Work great except fot the weight gain. What anti-pyshcotic made you lose weight?--Suzy