I have been trudging thru depression since I was young and now I am not all that far from 50.
(damn, really...sheesh...where the heck did my life go?)
I have had ups and downs but mostly tried to fix it myself and all I did was eff it up worse than you can imagine.
It may seem like a never ending battle; and I agree, for some of us it is. I don't like that realization but I can't handle the alternative, so I will just keep on keeping on...no matter what.
There surely must be some things in this life that make you happy....all I can suggest is to grasp those things and hold on for dear life.
Music gets me thru this hell.
I don't know where I would be without it.