I think this is what therapy has given me. The underlying sense that life is ok. Even when things are not always ok, life is ok.
I went to therapy for relief. But ended up waking up instead. It was and is painful at times to wake up. But I wanted to be awake more than I wanted to remain asleep. It hurt sometimes. Imagine being all snug & warm in bed and being suddenly awoken by a loud knocking and you put your feet on a cold hard floor as you go to answer the knocking.
The point between being snug and touching the floor is the hardest. But once you open the door you realise the cold hard floor was part of the nightmare and its actually a bird tapping on the widow on a beautiful spring day.
Now the warm, snug bed seems less appealing.
That's been my journey. Each time I awaken a little more, I realise that is the best direction.
Some of you will get this, some, alas won't. That is life.