Omg I am 61 and had my sunday last week completely thrown for a loop by a clogged toilet. But there's the internet now - we dont need parents anymore. I felt pretty good by the end of the day when I had handled it. I know you were just throwing it out there as a stupid for instance, but it crystallizes for me where you're coming from.

I think lola is sensitive to it because she hasnt resolved these issues completely for herself. Otherwise why would it bother her or me or anybody else who gets freaked out a little by this thread? A few years ago, my mother was yelling at me, why do you want to go spend x dollars on rent? I answered," I don't want to have to spend x dollars on rent. I'd rather live with you. But I can't take your criticizing me anymore." I was having shortness of breath and heart palpitations. I got it checked out, it's anxiety.

I also thought I needed my parents and my parents' money to live. My ts thru the years tried to tell me different. It's very scary to break away. But it's your parents' fear, not even your own. That's why it's so hard to deal with, so hard to beat down, to get rid of, to reason away. You DO something, like fix your own toilet, and you get stronger! That fear is gone, AND you gain power. That's why ts tell you ie me to just do something, anything - it will make a difference in how you feel. Because it's building YOU up, not arguing with THEM in your head (or IRL) - THEY always win.