OP - I don't find that every 20 year old I come into contact with is partying or drunk all the time. Nor even the legal ones who are 21. And most of the students where I teach (according to the statistics collected by the admissions office for undergraduates) are on scholarships and financial aid and working (working if past their freshman year). I add this because I think the perception of what everyone else is doing may be slightly skewed.

My question to you is what do you want people here to do for you? This is a real question and not a critical one - do you just want a place to vent and have people say they hear you, do you want suggestions on how to help yourself, do you want bigger picture reminders, do you want stories of hope about others who made hard choices at your age and like the ones you could make and survived to relate them, etc.?