Quote:
Originally Posted by shezbut
(((Maranara)))
Last night's post sufficed everything very clearly. I'm glad that you were in a calm state of mind, and able to take a step back from the emotions. That's a terrific improvement! 
I am sorry that this afternoon isn't going very well for you. Things will get better again... I know it! Have you had any luck finding a decent T to work with? Seeing one could really help you work through some of these experiences & hopefully be an appropriate safety net for you to rely upon.   |
When I'm not working, within a few days I am clear and can cope. It took longer this time, getting longer all of the time due to how bad it's getting. Within a day or two of going back to work, I start sliding again. It's an endless up and down cycle with the downs getting more severe all of the time. It's a cycle I have to break.
I go have a T, but she's 30 minutes away. The distance isn't the big deal. It's the cost of seeing her, the cost of gas money, and the constant hiding I'm still doing so my husband doesn't find out.
I'll be okay. Everything is linked to working at home and the sheer need of finding something else at this point. Sitting in front of the computer everyday in the same room with no outside connections is doing a number on me....would do a number on anyone I think in the exact same conditions. Too much stagnation, too much thinking, and absolutely no outlet at all.
Was going to say more, but suffice it to say I'm getting paranoid again....sigh.