It is like HELL.

Last year (in fact, this very time of year), I had a month/month and a half run of it and it was hands down the worst thing I've ever been through. It probably could've been shorter, but I was thousands of miles away from my psych when it happened.
Sorry to be so lazy, but having described it in a post a number of months ago, I'm cut and pasting it. Here goes:

It was gawdawful. Massively depressed, and utterly hopeless, but with lots of anger and tons of negative energy. All at once. Add in a couple of full-on melt-downs (not talking flip-outs, no idea how many of those there were) and mix till well-blended. O.M.G. Not sure if I've ever done such near-nonstop scathing rants and muttering at myself (and that's saying something, because that's something I do all the time). Self-loathing was through the roof and the extreme energy levels made it excruciating. I wanted to crawl out of my skin, rip my brain out and maybe slam myself into a wall at about 120mph. More than ideation and knowledge, you-know-what flashed visually through my mind on a regular basis. It.was.bad.

I'd had bursts of such a state many many times previously. But to have it go on and on? Indescribable.

I don't know how BF managed to not throw me in a cage.

I'd certainly have been safer in one.