UPDATE

So, I spoke with T today letting her know that I was struggling with deciding if and when I should give her the now 11 page letter. She went over why I felt the way she received it and when she read, etc. was important to me. And ultimately said she would really like to have the letter. I went on to tell her how that really didn't give me the answer I was looking for. She said that the decision would be mine. I told her I don't want the decision to be mine. I want her to tell me what to do. Of course she wouldn't tell me what to do, but she did say that she would really like to have the letter even if we were not going to address the topics at that time (my request). She also said giving her the letter may make me more comfortable in talking about the situation since it will already be in the air, and ultimately she would like to lighten my load and carry this burden with me. So I haven't decided in what format I will give it to her, but I have decided that I will give it to her, and she said she will follow any conditions I give her (shredding it, returning it to me, reading it when i'm there, reading it when i'm not, etc.) We agreed that ultimately this will be a test in trust and she knows that i've been betrayed and manipulated much in my past, so this would be a good way to see that all relationships are not like that. She said she would not judge me or hold anything against me, and because I am an adult there is nothing validly able to be reported in there, so that's not an issue. She agreed not to keep it in my file, and she says her case notes are very very vague, and that would not be in it. So...sometime this week, i'll be getting it to her. =]