It must be very hard going to see a new pdoc and then having to wait through the holidays to see him. Sometimes it helps me to take small chunks of time to get through and not try and cope with the entire time between now and the 3rd.

Please take care of yourself. I can only imagine how difficult this is for you right now. I guess I don't know what to say about the self medicating other than to please be very careful. I would hate to see somthing happen to my fellow bear.