Thanks for the reply, Heidi. Yeah, clean and sober is tough, but for some reason it seemed to come easily this time. As if seriously by some divine intervention. I'd been trying for a couple years to quit this stuff and, just, bam, I didn't crave it. Obviously, I'm skepticle and untrusting about the whole thing, the cravings are bound to happen. But I'll try to get positive.

When I quit this in the past, I definitely went into psychosis each time. Usually a few days after and for only one crazy night and a couple day "hangover". Absolutely psychosis. This time, I was waiting for it and nothing happened. It's been a few weeks and still no full blown episode. Maybe it's just happening, but differently this time? Slower, and drawn-out?

I feel fine right now, but 10 minutes ago I was feeling the usual bugs crawling on my feet or wherever, but with nothing there. I'm frustrated because it seems none of what's going on with me is big enough to cause any serious alarm, but it's just beating the hell out of me as a whole. I think most of us are always so close to losing everything financially and see our lives truly fall apart, and I'm tired of seeing that in my near future.

Anyway, thanks again, and I will be seing the doc again soon, though I know it's just going to be scripts for more bottles I can't afford. Who knows, maybe something positive will happen . . .

Jason