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_Sky said:
<font color="blue"> I'd like to see the boundary issue worked out from my own perspective...that of not allowing what others think and project into my own thinking. I know better. I need to block that stuff out... keep a boundary on that so I don't become affected by their ignorance or mal-intent

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Sky, I've learned to work on my boundary problems from the inside out; I don't want to keep things out, that's impossible and takes a lot of energy to try. I put "magic" into my boundaries themselves so my own knowledge and perceptions of myself take care of any problems.

One of the hardest things for me to learn has been (still learning!) to remember that I don't know what others think/feel or what their motives are, etc. unless I ask/talk to them. My "thinking" and perceptions is what gets in my way, not the other person and what they're doing or saying. Because I perceive the other person as ignorant or mal-intending doesn't make them so and even if they are, it doesn't make it "personal" to me. Other people lashing out at me in their pain need not hurt me if the lashing out doesn't belong to me. Of course, I do like it sounds like you do and stick my shield up anyway to block anything that appears to be coming my way before it gets to me instead of looking at it well enough to see where it belongs Of course, then I think I'm in the middle of a "battle" when I might not be or when it might have been avoided or resolved (if its my battle). I strike back and cause chaos and confusion of my own