...I want to give up - already failed three times this year anyway, and the way things are going it'll probably be four before long. But if I gave up, I'd let my therapist down, and I don't want that. And I don't want to let you all down either - you were the ones who encouraged me to quit each time.

But I don't have the strength...stupid useless weak......why am I making such a big deal out of this anyway? It's only hair! I'm not going to end up in hospital, I'm not going to get scarred, it doesn't even hurt that much. And all I'd be hurting is myself, and I wouldn't mind...it's not like I pull other people's hair out. But I would mind, because I hate that I feel the need to do it. I shouldn't.

I want to give up. But I don't. I'm so confused.