I do know about the "should" thing, I do it all the time myself. Same thing with the being hard on myself too.

Exams do make everything worse, I'm in the middle of mine.

What about writing whenever you feel the urge? Write anything, words that come to mind, feelings or the like? Doesn't always work, but it's worth a shot.

((((((((Rio))))))))) Take care of yourself, you're important.