I can't stop my brain from seeing him, hearing his voice all the time.

I don't know if this is just a symptom of my PTSD or if it's just my mind being messed up as usual. But it feels like everywhere I turn he is watching me. It almost feels like I sense him standing outside of my bedroom door, or him hiding behind the curtains in the kitchen, or hiding in the pantry, just waiting for the right chance to pop out and hurt me again

I can't sleep at night because his voice is so loud, yet he's just whispering like, in my ear. I can hear him all throughout the day and night sometimes and it's just terrifying it feels like I cannot escape him. It's gotten to that point where I am hurting myself because I am scared that if I don't, he will come out from where he is hiding and hurt me. I know he just wants to see me hurt, so better i hurt myself than have him do it to me. I know he's out there somewhere watching me and everyday he's getting closer and closer and I'm so scared he'll find me

I just don;t know what to do. I don't know why I feel like this
Everything is just a mess right now