What do you mean she doesn't see what's going on? Is she avoiding your child's medical issues or are you speaking of her not being able to see that your marriage is failing? Sometimes events like that can bring a family closer because it is like a wake up call and you realize just how much your loved ones mean to you. Although other times the strain of the situation and worry can cause a person to detach to the point where it's hard to come back. What have you guys tried in helping this situation?