Again thankyou all for helping me out. I didn't reply to her text this morning but she sent another this afternoon talking about the weather and saying have a good day. I wanted to reply to her saying please don't text me anymore but only managed a "U2". For me that's kind of big step because I really wanted to start a chat with her.

No she doesn't feel like my soulmate when she is on crack but the thing is she will do it maybe once a week if that and not usually when I'm around. You are so right Bonnie I am dependent on the idea of a perfect love. When I think about her I only remember the good times and never the bad. She still feels like my soulmate because she still is the same person I fell for years ago.

I feel for ya oldlife. Breaking up is very hard to do. "Happy before they came into our life" that's gonna help me a lot. Thanks.

Yes hermit I have been applying for jobs down south and hope to get one soon. I am hoping the distance will make it easier to break my ties. I did do it once before when we split for five years but I never did get involved in another relationship. It took a couple years for me to start being happy but it eventually happened. I can't believe I got suckered into having to go through this all over again. Sorry to hear about your relationship with your sister that must be hard and I can only emagine as me and my on brother and one sister are quite close although I could never confide in them my problems because I don't want them to think badly of her.