I'm getting better after the hellish weekend I put myself thru. If i had it to do over I would have remembered that i was already under a lot of stress. So when my bf got reactive I would have just breathed. Starting to wonder if a pattern is forming that when I need his support the most, I can't count on him. Time will tell. I'm feeling stronger in my adult self. We'll see how he responds to my wanting us to do some relationship work. Reminds me of the movie with Merryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones. I'm prepared to respond as she did when he seemed uninterested in doing the work. All you can do is accept that and leave. I believe in working this out. And i believe relationships take work. Th one thing that I know is that it can't continue on this path. We need to get on to the road less traveled. And all I can do is work on myself and my actions/reactions, thoughts, feelings... and refilling my life with things that bring me peace and pleasure. Tonight I'm going back to my weekly hiking.