Always, always alone! For so long and all the time. I have done it all to try and resolve this situation. Posted my face in a singles-dating site, joined groups and keep meeting new people...but all I see is people matching up with each other everywhere I go. For me there is nobody. Being alone has taken its own shape and sound in my life.
I don't think I am ugly. I think I am quite presentable. I am also well educated. However nobody approaches me and because I don't see anybody looking my way, I don't approach anyone either.
This feeling of loneliness is affecting my job lately. I have stopped going to work on time and early. I wake up in the morning and I so don't give a d*** about anything anymore. I have stopped being productive too. All I find myself doing at work is checking my email every minute in hopes that I get some email from somebody. Lately I have cought myself welcoming spam email as well. How pathetic is that? Then, after working hours, everybody goes home and I just sit at my desk, pretending that I am working hard. I stay there late even till 11:00pm sometimes, so that when I come back home I won't have to face a silent apartment. All I do when I come back is go to sleep and in this way I don't have to remember my situation.
Yes I know, pretty pathetic. I had never thought that I would become like this.