Telling him that he is out of his depth with you was a ba-a-a-d idea. Do not judge him. Use "I" statements - tell him what you feel, need, want, desire, etc., but do not tell him that he is out of his depth with you. You are not a project or an assignment of his, hence using the "out of his depth" line on him was not called for. I would apologize for this one, since that indeed was a wrong thing to do. Hopefully being a little apologetic would earn you a brownie point or two with him. It would also be a Litmus test - if he is softened by and appreciative of your heartfelt apology, then good, and if he is not, then he is not worth your time. People's reactions to apologies give plenty of information you can use by way of character judgment.

Good luck, any which way it turns out. And, be sure to get some trauma therapy since the rape seems to have had quite a deep effect on you that you'd want to counteract.