Hi all,
Something I'm struggling with lately is the feeling that my bipolar illness is becoming more aggressive. I wasn't diagnosed until I was 43, before then I was probably more of a cyclothymic, I was able to manage things even though I got depressed off and on, it was never deep enough that I felt I needed to see a dr. I raised a family, lived the nomadic military lifestyle for over 20 years, I even went back to school and got my teacher's license and did better in school that time than I ever did in my early years. I got sick the last year of school, beginning with mania and had my depressive breakdown the second week of student teaching. Its been downhill since then. I am now 50, I haven't seen the inside of a classroom in 3 years, each year I seem to cycle more, the dr needs to add more meds and now my anxiety issues are becoming almost as serious as the bipolar because they fuel the episodes...what might be ordinarily a mild episode with my mood stabilizers on board becomes amplified by anxiety. We're treating the bipolar with an antipsychotic and two mood stabilizers, the depression and anxiety with an antidepressant and anti anxiety med, the adhd with another antidepressant because I can't take a stimulant.
I've been looking up the cognitive issues, executive function issues and I know I am not working with the brain I had in my twenties and thirties, not even up to mid forty. It kind of sucks to be honest. Anyway, I was wondering if there were any other folks out here who feel like their bipolar is progressing or becoming more aggressive as they get older? I'm not sure I articulated this feeling to my tdoc the other day very well. Just thought I'd look for answers amongst my fellow bp'ers.