Ok....so we're not quite ex's YET...we're not fully divorced, but we're separated...and NOT getting back together.

The boys are with me this week...and they talk to their dad every morning, and every night...and apparently, he goes and has lunch with them EVERY day. When they are with him...they sleep in his bed with him. They are 9 and 11. This just seems strange to me. It doesn't seem right. Ok, once a week, sure...maybe even a couple times when they are with me...but it's like he's obsessed...because of my schedule, he picks them up from school on Mondays and takes them to scouts - and they're with him until almost 9pm (even on my weeks) and then he picks them up Tuesdays and I go get them from his house around 5pm when I am done with my stuff.

I love talking to my boys everyday -- and try to make sure when they are with him, that I get to talk and pray with them. But...they sleep in their own beds in their own bedroom. I take them to school and sit with them at breakfast SOMETIMES - otherwise they take the bus. I want to go see them at lunchtime sometimes -- but certainly don't have time to do it EVERYDAY. (he's living on disability from the military so he doesn't have to work -- and probably never will).

anyway...it just seems abnormal to me the way he is attached to them. I mean, maybe it's ME that's abnormal...I love my boys like crazy and want to be with them, but I also want them to be able to function independently. I don't WANT to go to see them at lunch everyday -- partly because that's a time when they can develop friendships with kids at school. If I am there, I take that time/opportunity away from them.

Obviously I can't stop him from going to see them at lunch...and I can't stop him from sleeping with them in his bed...but really? This can't be healthy for my boys! They started sleeping in his bed with him the first night I stopped (left) - I heard him say to them "who wants to sleep in daddy's bed tonight?"
If they were like 4/5 years old, it might be ok...but at 9 and 11?

I don't know what (if anything) I should do or say...