I went to the doctor yesterday morning. I told him about how I have been feeling lately and that I stopped with Saroquel. He said the Prozac alone will not help and has cut the Prozac from 20 mg to 10 mg and has now prescribed me Depakote 250 mg, twice daily. (I'm very small, about 5' 3" and 40 kg, so my doses are not really massive) He wanted to commit me due to how depressed I have been and angry...I declined. If I am committed, I cannot work. If I do not work, I will have no place to live and no way to pay for treatment. Uggh.

I did make an appointment to see a Psychiatrist next week. Hopefully the medication is working to a certain extent and I can talk about my feelings. I qualified for the sliding scale pricing, so this makes me feel better about paying for treatment. I am going to ask them if my Psych can have a sit down consultation or something with my boyfriend so he can understand what I am going through. I am getting ZERO support. I haven't told my family nor my employer about my Bipolar disorder. I am ashamed and embarrassed. I do not want this! Great....made myself cry.

This Depakote is making me sick to my stomach. I still feel full of rage and anger.