Since I started cutting a week ago (I've had urges for some years, but they managed to take control over me just a few days ago) I feel my BPD became relatively stable compared to past. But as soon I try to resist the urge I start to feel very anxious and I can sense depression coming back, I need to do at least one cut a day. So, I feel it's either SI or BPD. I don't want to go back to these uncontrollable mood swings and other horrors, but I also feel it's wrong to cut. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place here, and I don't know how to get out.