Quote:
Originally Posted by Maranara
I am trying to be friends. It is very hard for me to let people close enough to get to that point, and then I cling to them. I also have a tendancy of putting all of my attention on one or two friends and discounting the rest of them. I know a lot of people around here consider me a friend but I have a hard time accepting that a lot of the time. I am attempting to stop doing this. They are all important and most of my friends could use me as a friend as well.
I believe I'm an okay listener though I do my share of dumping as well. I have no one to dump on in the "real world" and this place is my only outlet. When a person becomes a "real friend", whatever that is, can't really put a definition on it, I'll do anything for them, bend over backwards, to the point of hurting myself. Yep, there's the black and white thinking for sure. I either ignore and discount or I smother you....sigh. At least I don't push too much anymore. I guess that's a good thing....and at least I'm aware of what I'm doing and what it happening. For a long, long time, I didn't have a clue.
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I do the exact same thing. I just wonder if we can help each other here by working on ways that we can improve our relationships rather than just "venting" or "complaining" or whatever we want to call it, and then assuring each other that we all do the same thing... It does help to know that I am not the only one, but I sure would like to be able to have the kind of relationships that I see other people have, or at least perceive that they have. Again, just some thoughts.