Quote:
Originally Posted by hamster-bamster
it can be taken as an accusation of sorts in the right context. without knowing more about the details of your relationship, it is not possible to really give an opinion from an outsider's perspective. I can tell you that "That's so weird, I have it right here." was totally appropriate to say and could not have been taken as an accusation of sorts, but "Did you mean to send the text to someone else?" could have been taken as an accusation - "could have" does not mean "should have"!!! - depending on the context, again, and, depending on the tone of your voice when you said it. In a written form, this utterance does not convey your tone of voice, so it is not possible to give an objective opinion.
this is just an observation about this little tidbit - in general, your feeling of being in a precarious position when talking to him and your apprehension of triggering him by the slightest little thing mean that more work needs to happen in this relationship to make it more equitable (=so that he can be with you more or less the way you can be with him).
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Thinking through what you wrote, I'm sure there was at least a hint of accusation in my second question. Unfortunately, not knowing the phone could auto-generate a text message like this, it seemed as if he was not telling me the truth. It should have been funny, but he made me feel like I was being psycho for being worried about the disconnect. I never raised my voice or accused him of anything....so, I do understand him being mad, but not to the level he took it. My solution is always to talk about things openly...but I fear that right now, while he's under all this stress, I need to just keep quiet. Which means I just get to keep wondering about stuff with no resolution (and means it could just build up even more by not talking about it)....I don't know how to approach him about this, since that could just trigger more...you are right, this is a bit precarious and it makes my head hurt.