I'm not sure I quite understand who said what. Did you say that you were a liability or did he say it? If you said it, and you're beginning to ruminate a bit, it may be a sign of an oncoming depression (reflected in statements of low self-worth). If he said it, that's a different story and a very confusing one for sure.

Even without the complications of the bipolar, relationships can feel muddled at times. Is marriage important to you? Have you talked about why it isn't something that he wants? How long ago did you disclose the bipolar to him?

I hope your long run helps clear your head a bit. And you are so much more than your diagnosis. There is no place for stigma in a loving relationship. Hopefully he knows that and isn't treating you differently in that regard.

I guess it all depends on who said what.