With all the stress I've been dealing with & now stbxh is being a jerk & finally just told him to get himself a lawyer & they could sort it out because I wasn't going to give into his warped sense of values.......got a new smart phone & trying to get all the numbers set up & try to get my friends my new number..........find myself up for days & forgetting to even eat because I'm focused on all the high priority things my brain needs to focus on.......I was so shocked at how much I had lost this morning when I weighed myself after no weighing for several weeks......& of course, the food that I ate last night went through so fast,......even laxitives never worked that fast on me years ago when I was into that.......

I have been feeling that spacy depersonalization feeling where I am sort of just here doing the things I have to do but loose complete track of time & days......like I thought wednesday morning was only Tuesday & couldn't figure out where Tuesday went & yet I know because I was here sitting at my computer desk all day......she said it's a combination of not eating well, not sleeping well & all the anxiety I'm dealing with.....all together, my body reacts with that sort of feeling when I end up watching myself functioning.....I feel not there & yet my mind is there....it's this very spacey feeling that's hard to describe......other than I hate it when it happens because I feel so out of control of myself.....end up having so many things that I have to do that many don't even get touched because I end up stuck in the one thing I am fucusing on.....have even missed appointments......totally not being able to get the body to function beyond just sitting there & doing what it's been doing.

Just hope that this level of anxiety will not be too long lasting because I don't have enough weight to spare at this point in time

Right now my head's doing this whiring sort of thing that is part of that spacey feeling......need to get to bed.....but the other night when I went to bed early, I ended up waking up in a few hours & that was a wasted night because I couldn't get back to sleep......grrrrrm