Beta:

I understand. I understand so very much. My family denies everything that went on too, and outsiders to our family life would agree with the rest of them - because we had to act like our family was great.

My mom and my brother would do something awful, and then even a few hours later they would deny it and I'd end up feeling like I imagined the whole thing. If they kept going after me, eventually I would raise my voice because that was the reaction they wanted from me. To immediately get told to quiet down, the neighbours will hear, and what are you overreacting about anyway we were just having a conversation....

I cut ties with my younger brother. I didn't say anything to him about it... I just did. I have MINIMAL contact with my mom and it is through text messages, as she has learned that I will not use the phone.

You won't be able to change your family members. You can't change if you think that nothing is wrong with you; and that is what your family thinks about themselves. So they can't change.

You can though And you've already started to set your boundaries - and it's hellish, I know. They'll do everything they can to keep control over you and to keep you in that position of "guilt" so that they have someone to blame.

Truth be told, they'll even feel more assured that they're right once you assert those boundaries.

But we both know that they aren't. Ok? They aren't. Your perspective on how you grew up is correct and true.