Thanks avlady my T said during the first month of treatment she is shocked at all the trauma I've been through. She validated all my feelings about them and she told me "you're not crazy, you've just been through a lot of s**t" then I got really angry for awhile about all the injustices of living in poverty. This is the best T I've ever had, I've had 5 therapists so far in my life, this is the only one who let me know that she also struggled from mental health issues. I can relate so much better to her because she knows how it feels more than the PHD Psychoanalyst I used to see. I recently had a "come to Jesus" moment and started practicing forgiveness for the small stuff, I am still working on the bigger issues. Because I had always repressed my anger and when I did express it, I expressed it in explosive and violent ways that were destructive of myself and others. I became my own worst enemy, paranoid and self sabotaging.

"Battle not with monsters, lest ye become a monster, and if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you." - Friedrich Nietzsche German philosopher