I completely relate to what you are experiencing. Before reading your post, I've never understood why I experience a lack of motivation, and, even at times, complete loathing for things that that I once unquestionably enjoyed. Thank you for writing about this.

I've read through what a few other members have written in response, and the reply that most resonated with me was from online user.

I want to share the following quote, which I often say to myself when I am struggling or having difficulty in day to day life, especially when trying to get myself to do something.

"A thousand-mile journey starts with one step."

It is an old Taoist saying that I read recently in The Tao of Pooh (well worth the read!).

For me, though I sometimes, and often most of the time, do not enjoy playing tennis, hiking, reading, drawing, etc., I push myself to do these things because I am on a journey to recovery. I know deep down that these activities connect me with who I know I am and what I know I like, even though I might feel otherwise at the current moment. I know pushing yourself to do something is difficult, and I often struggle with it on a daily basis.

Though, what I have experienced is that, when I do push myself to go out for a run, I sometimes enjoy it. Once I am out there, I reframe the "pushing" as positive motivation, and it makes me feel good about myself.

Also, I have come to terms with the fact that I will not enjoy the entire experience. It sounds like this is something that you are experiencing. However, what I have found is that, if I can get myself to enjoy just 1-2 minutes of the run, then that for me is a huge victory. Though, it took me a while to accept that the entire experience cannot be enjoyable. Again, it's all a journey.

I hope that sharing my personal struggles with lack of motivation help you, and I especially hope that you take the Taoist saying to heart. I helps me enormously.