Hi...
first I am sending gentle ((((hugs))) ) your way.

You are mirroring the feelings that I have been feeling lately. I hope that it helps a little that you are most definetly not alone and that your post helped me a great deal.... I've been going to alot of specialists lately.. I too was up front with the doctors because I truly wanted and needed help....
The ENT doctor was really brutal in his assessment of me.
I was/am still very angry.

My pdoc and my best friend keep giving me moral support and courage to try different doctors. My best friend in particular gave me some "horror" stories of her own and she doesn't have PTSD. They both helped me to come to the conclusion that it wasn't my PTSD as much as it was an unflexible DR. Their words " you are too important to me to have you give up so get cracking".

I wanted so badly to quit after the ENT Dr. right then and there... But I am sooo miserable that I just couldn't. The PF dr had read the ENT's write-up and I thought here we go and we did... But I confronted him and he came around. The sleep clinic personal have been very kind to me. I still have to see the sleep specialist - but if he is unacceptant I refuse to feel bad.

I don't know if it helps but there are some decent DR's out there. When I lived in a small town, I was forced to drive a couple of hours to a larger town for doctors. I don't know if you have the resources to do that but that worked for me. It was very time consuming but it worked.

You can take comfort in the fact that you did the right thing for your daugther. I fought with doctors constantly for care of my son - he had a genetic problem with his lungs. At the time I got so tired out because I was battling my own health and mental issues. But I look back at it and I am proud of what I did and it brings me comfort. Doesn't do away with the anger but it makes me feel better that I didn't let the Dr's ignorance win out when dealing with me the MOM. I heard it all. One night I had jsut had a lump removed from my breast and my son's lung collapsed again. I took him to ER where the resident wanted to put a tube in and I said NO - he was fine til morning when the specialist could see him. Well the resident was so put out that he couldn't "practice" on my son that he refused to request a room. So there we laid on the same bed - my son on one end and me on the other. A nurse took pity - she said he was punishing us and then she proceed to "yell" at him. He did get us a bed but she paid a price and I did the next day by the specialist's resident taking me to task for putting in my two cents on my son's care.

More than anything I would like to give you the hope and support that you need right now. I hope that I haven't said anything that makes it worse.
Sincerely,
Lu