I'll do anything - buy supplements to assist me. I have been researching and coming up with horrible and dangerous permanent side effects of meds which doctors don't want us to know about. Such as permanent sexual dysfunction, brain literally snapping and never being the same, permanent numbness. I always hated anti depressants and always will. They never felt natural to me, for a good reason. If anyone can point me in the right direction, I'll be eternally grateful. Thank you.

Edit: The longer I am in therapy, the more I am coming to learn that my depression is stored in my body, not in my brain. So why alter my brain via a potentially dangerous method?