You have to give permission to Little Jan to cry. The little girl who just wanted to be loved and hugged and soothed and heard and seen.

Tell her it is okay to cry. That she didn't do anything wrong. That she is/was loveable. Only then, when she knows YOU give her permission, can all those forbidden tears fall.

I heard a woman say the other day on TV something like, "Life is like a flower. It needs both sun and water to grow. If you left it in the light all day it would wither. Think of these tears as the water. They will help you grow."

((( Hugs to all the inner Januarys )))